[Achilles]

He sat at the mouth of a den, the recent windy gusts absent this day. 

Over all the feeling was a dead one. He heard little to no activity in the Valley, the elements were still and quiet, he hadn't spoken to anyone all day. He stared blankly at the dark opening and the empty interior, been staring actually. He'd been there most of the day, the full weight of how quiet and how lonely he was while everyone was away fighting for their lives was crushing his heart. He had no idea he'd been there for so long, he had little thought at all aside from the deafening silence that surrounded the place he'd claimed for his family. The sounds of little pups shouting and playing, the contented huffs of a beautiful and strong willed mate.

Silence.

Like a grave.

He'd spent maybe two nights here after the others had left but the lack of bodies to share in their warmth, the overly stillness of the empty den. It chilled his bones and so he couldn't stand it. He felt more comfort laying under the stars, howling at the moon in hopes that they'd return his sorrowful call in their far away place. The only calls were others missing their families or their friends...the Goddesses. He'd tried every night though, to stay in the den but soon it became too hard to even enter the thing, like now. Standing outside like he was some stranger to his own house. He felt vile and weak but he knew this feeling couldn't be shaken.

He blinked finally, his eyes dry and bloodshot from staring so long. His belly roared at him but he ignored it, he didn't feel hungry even if his body knew he was. He wondered if they had eaten today, if they were healthy. He honestly wondered if they were even alive but every time that thought touched his mind, he recoiled form it like a viper. Still, he hadn't moved, he'd likely stay like this until the sun went down. 

If he was lucky, his body would do him a favor and he'd collapse from exhaustion and maybe get a wink of sleep.

Probably not...

[Sphinx]

It was all spiraling now... and she wasn't sure she would be able to stop it.

Sphinx watched as the sun made its way towards the horizon, pretty features outlined by subtle hints of exhaustion. Still, there was hope shining in those emerald eyes ringed by dark circles. Her shift was almost done. Soon, one of her officers would climb up the cliffs, toss her something to eat, and then finally relieve her of her duties. It had been three whole days since she had last taken an adequate break. Three. whole. days. She couldn't quite believe that she had made it through. Despite her exhaustion and disbelief, the necessity of it all was not lost on her. They were all spread so very thin after Oukoku-Kai's small army left for war, and it wasn't like their numbers were overflowing to begin with. She had barely a handful of officers at her command, and too many duties to keep track of here in the Valley. There were children that needed to be guarded, there were borders that needed patrolled, and there were slaves that needed watched. All of these things had to be done, but there weren't enough of them. She was doing the best she could with what she had...

She could have always followed Gigantea into war. It was a thought that popped into her head every time she felt her body about to quit on her, and it was a thought that sent her right back into action... with a sick feeling churning in the pit of her stomach. When the Rosas were generating the support for the war and organizing their battle efforts, Sphinx had offered immediately to stay behind and guard the holy land. She could still hear the echo of the words she had used to show how important it was for her to stay... she could still hear each and every one of those horrific, well-told lies that she sold.

The pretty little priestess climbed to her paws and took a few measured paces towards the slave quarters, half to quiet her mind and half to quiet the grumblings of the heathens within. Only the slaves fell into a hushed silence. 

She could have been there, fighting beside the Rosas. She had done it before. Sphinx remembered what it felt like to leap into battle without a moment's hesitation. She remembered what it felt like to throw herself into the line of fire for Aglacea. Her mind had never been more focused, her body had never felt more alive... her soul had never felt more fulfilled. Fighting off a wolf twice her size, all in the name of Gigantea, had been one of the best moments of her life. And it was why she had fought so hard to not go into the war by Scherenzade's side.

She was afraid. Not of the fighting, not of the war, not of even of dying. She was afraid that if she went into war for the current White Rose, if she had done the exact same thing for Ana as she had for Grendel... that she wouldn't get that same feeling of fulfillment. Goddesses,  she was afraid she would feel the same discontentment she had been feeling for months and that it would finally break her. That moment would just confirm that she no longer had control of her spiral. 

Her officer arrived, mentioning he had left a doe for her at the bottom of the cliffs, and the Warden Priestess was finally relieved of her duties. Sphinx climbed down, retrieved her gift, and made her way towards home.

Thetis, Tibet, Ana, Grendel, Jezebeth.... The thoughts and memories were endless torment. Spiraling, spiraling, spiraling. 

"Achilles?" The doe slid from her grasp just before her lover's name slipped from her mouth. There were notes of disbelief mingled in with the usual warm tones of her voice. He was here... She had no idea he hadn't left for the war. Still, just seeing her golden knight was enough to quell the thoughts threatening to overtake her... was enough to replace her discontentment with joy. The social butterfly moved with practiced grace to his side, to press herself against him. "You have no idea how good it is to see--"

Her voice cut off when she took in his condition. Her golden knight looked as exhausted as she felt... but there was something else there too. Sphinx couldn't quite put her paws on it, but she knew for a fact that the light of her life had never looked so broken before.

"My love, are you okay?"

[Achilles]

The absolute last thing he expected in that moment was to hear the sweet song voice of his beloved Sphinx. If it had been anyone else he would have likely growled and spun on them but there was no mistaking that beautiful tone of hers. His surprise was evident on his face, however, feral blue eyes wide and his maw agape. 

Was she real? Was she just a figment of his desperate imagination, torturing him for allowing her to go without him? The warm and softness of her embrace shocked like a lightning bolt! She was real, here and alive! 

"Sphinx," there was so much relief in his voice, like the weight of the world had been removed from his shoulders. He embraced her in return but held back when she hesitated. He looked her over and saw no injuries, no marks of any kind at all. "You are unharmed?" How could she have followed the others into war and no suffered a single cut? Of course, if she hadnt gone then no wounds.

"I thought you went to war," he nuzzles her cheek with his nose. "I was ordered to remain here and protect the valley while the war party was out." He pulled away, "all this time and we were both here?" A silly smirk touched his lips as he stated into her bright green gems. "I was so stupid, suffering because instead of looking or calling out for you, I just accepted the lie I told myself." 

He'd embrace her again, hugging her tight. "I'm such a fool, I'm so glad you are alive."

[Sphinx]

There he was.


The worried lines on her face melted away as she watched the life flow back into her mate, and she smiled widely when those ocean blue eyes of his met her own emerald green. Goddess, how had she gone so long without those eyes in her life? It couldn't have been more than two weeks, three weeks tops, but it felt like a lifetime had passed since she had gotten to see him. Her name, falling from his mouth with relief and love, sent desire howling through her nervous system, and his embrace warmed the places of her heart that her doubts and fears and insecurities had started to ice over. None of those things mattered if he was here, if he was alright. 

As shocked as she was that Foetida hadn't brought him into battle beside her, she was also so very relieved. She couldn't have lost him too.

"I thought you had left as well..." Her voice trailed off as he nuzzled her cheek, her eyes drifting closed as she hummed her quite contentment. When he pulled away, she returned the affection with a gentle kiss to his own muzzle. "I had no idea you were here, but I should've known. You always find a way to protect me, even when I don't even know it." She grinned at his silly smile, and shouldered him playfully when he called himself stupid. In her eyes, he was anything but. "I think we're both a little to blame for that. Once the war party left... I just threw myself into work. Between organizing the officers, guarding the slaves, and keeping track of the newest litter, it helped distract me from the war."

When he moved in closer, and hugged her tight, she folded into his embrace. She buried her head into his neck, nuzzling close and nodding her agreement at his statement. It meant the world to have him here, safe and sound. Still, Sphinx knew she couldn't sit in his embrace forever--no matter how safe it felt. He had been commanded to stay. She had chosen to. She didn't know if she was ready to tell her love the whole truth, but she also didn't want there to be any secrets between them. Sphinx needed him to see all of her, and not who he thought she was. 

"I wasn't in the war party because I had asked to stay and guard the land." The pretty little priestess was still pressed against him when she admitted the words. There was a note of disappointment in the sentence, mixed with even a slight touch of guilt. She should have gone. She should have just pushed her silly feelings aside and gone. She was one of the best warriors in the valley, maybe she could have been out there... making a difference.  Even knowing this, she still felt like she had made the right decision. If she had gone, who knows what kind of faith-broken shell she would've come back as. She stayed silent for a few beats after that, not quite ready to admit everything, but feeling better now that she told him. There was something else he needed to know as well. "All three of the boys left. They joined the war efforts." Al, Andy, Noah... Her three handsome men were all out there fighting for their home. There was a note of pride in her voice, but worry as well. 

So much had changed.

[Achilles]

She was a splendid light, just beholding her lifted his spirits and seeing that he did the same for her, it only helped the surge of relief and love. He was truly blessed to have something so perfect to share his love with, someone so absolutely without flaw. Her words tickled his ego a little, he would always do his best to protect her of course but he couldn't be everywhere at once. She made him feel like he could though and that was what mattered, she made him feel at his best. He sighed gratefully, her sharing the blame took some of the sting of his foolishness away but still he felt bad that she held any blame at all, he wanted to take it from her but knew it would only insult her. 

"Of course you delved into your work, I had done the same, spending more time nearest the borders, patrolling with the guardians of the maze."

It was annoying that none of them had ever mentioned that his pretty priestess might still be inland, they knew her, they had to know her. Any slaves would be brought to her! Then again, fewer slaves would come while the Valley was without the protection of the Goddesses. It just wasn't smart to bring in heathens and those defiled by the Red Dragon's taint while the holy trinity was concentrating on evil elsewhere. 

As they embraced, he felt her shift, in her nervousness before voicing her supposed shortcoming. He leaned into her and chuckled softly, "Silly girl, do you think you are ugly for it?" He leaned away and looked her in the eyes, his ears tilted back ever so slightly in his concern. "Do you think I would be ashamed of you?" He smiled widely, ears turning up in excitement. "You have seen the worlds horrors, you know what heathens are capable of better than most that have yet to go beyond the safety the Maze provides them." She'd battled evil, defended Grendel from it like the champion she was, he could only ever be proud of her. "You are no coward my love, don't ever let that thought cross your mind." He kissed her as softly as he could, "You did what was best Sphinx, I would never fault you for being true to yourself." Glory and war was not for everyone, she was not Foetida's like Achilles was. Her talents were better suited for the healing of the sick minded and bringing the grace of the Rosa into their lives without the savagery of battle. 

The second thing she shared was more difficult, "Of course they went." He smiled with pride and worry that mirrored her own. "They are our boys after all..." He looked back into her eyes. "They are with our Rosa, if they live through this trial, they will be welcomed back as heros each, if they fall they did so for the sake of our goddesses and our people, there is no greater honor." It wasn't easy to say though, his voice faltered here and there, not that he doubted the boys of the Rosa but he knew the world beyond, he knew what battle was before he'd even been saved by the Gods of their home. 

Battle had casualties. 

No matter the outcome, Oukoku-Kai would suffer losses.

He nuzzled into her cheek to reassure her anyways, "I will seek out the Rosa upon their return, I will learn their fates and come for you here." So we may praise and wail in the privacy. 

It was his promise.

[Sphinx]

"Of course you delved into your work, I had done the same, spending more time nearest the borders, patrolling with the guardians of the maze."

"Well, aren't we quite the pair?" Sphinx asked, laughing as she did. To know that they were both in the valley, close enough to touch and ease all of the worry and loneliness of the other, but too far to even notice the other was there, it was kind of comical. Sure, it had hurt before... actually, it had been absolutely earth-shattering and exhausting before, but now? Now that he was right in front of her, it was almost as if it had all been one big, cruel joke."At least no one can accuse us of shirking our duties. Goddess, its good to see you." 

She listened next as he tried to ease her guilt about not heading into battle alongside the Rosas, and while she appreciated every word he said... It missed the mark by a hair. The Warden priestess couldn't blame her golden knight for that though; if she didn't give him enough to go off of, he would never be able to say everything she needed to hear. One day though, she would come clean about her wavering faith. Until then, it was nice to know he did not judge her for her decisions, and that he still knew her enough to believe that she was strong, and capable, and brave. When he kissed her gently, she leaned into the affection, whispering a soft, "Thank you, Achilles," in return.


The notes of pride in his voice for their sons, echoing the feelings she had in her own heart, brought tears to her eyes. She could picture each of them--even her little Noah--standing tall and proud over a defeated heathen... unfortunately, on her weaker moments, she could also picture each of them bloody, broken, and discarded in a pile of holy bodies. Tools, for the three Rosas to use as they pleased. All three of them would so willingly give all of themselves for their deities. Just as Sphinx and Achilles had taught them to. Just as Sphinx and Achilles would have done themselves. She swallowed hard before managing to get the next question out. "Have you heard anything about the girls?"

At his promise to talk to the Rosa, Sphinx nodded her thanks and blinked until the tears clouding her vision disappeared. Whatever happened to her children, she just wanted to know.

"If I'm not here, I promise I'm not missing or out at war." Sphinx forced a mischievous smile, and tried to add a little bit of levity to the situation by playfully bumping him on the shoulder. If her voice wasn't wavering under the weight of worry for her children, it might have been a funny joke. Everything felt so serious, so heavy. When had her life gotten so exhausting? Sphinx shook off the thoughts and motioned towards the deer she had brought home with her, stomach growling at the thought of the fresh food. Couldn't let her officer's hard work go to waste, right? The social butterfly turned back to look at the Yellow Seour then with a wink, mischievous smile growing wider,"Tonight's is the only time I have off before I have to return to duty. Care to have dinner and spend the night with me, my love?"

[Achilles]

"Quite the pair indeed," He'd agree, they were silly as silly got. Her laughter was a breath of fresh air, he might have described it as gold but it wasn't only valuable, it was one of a kind. She had the single most beautiful laugh he'd ever heard and would ever hear in his lifetime. Surely the giggles of his daughters in their youth were cute and heart warming but nothing was like her's. He nodded softly to her claim about their work, "They could try but i'd bite them for it." He grinned a toothy smile and nipped at her cheek to emphasize his seriousness. 

He felt his face warm when she praised the Rosa for being able to see him again, "And for me as well, I've longed to see nothing else from the moment we lost spoke." Of course he'd nuzzle her affectionately after affirming their shared adoration. 

She thanked him for his words but somehow he felt that her soft whisper hid something, it broke his heart a little that he'd failed in some regard but he didn't allow it to show on his face. There would be a time and a place for whatever it was and she'd bring it to him then, just not here or now. He could wait, he would do anything for her.

After the words on their boys, she asked about their girls. He sighed softly, each of their lovely faces popping into his mind like he could see them clear as day...even their little lost Maive. "They," the two remaining that had lived and grown, "Did not go off to war, this I know." He rested his cheek against hers while he spoke about the young ladies. "They are working on their own lives here within the Valley, finding their way." Truth be told, he'd seen little of them at all but that was okay. He missed them dearly but knew they needed to make their own way without his influence or interference. "I'm sure they will come back when they feel they have something to show us." The children had always longed to make Sphinx and Achilles proud, it was the sin of their family but it was a productive motivator. "Soon."

She spoke playfully after their heavy talk of the children, he heard the tenseness in her voice but the nudge told him everything he needed. He smirked faintly and growled a playful sound. "You better not be or i'd hunt you down and drag you home." Though it was all said in good fun, he would go out searching for her, he would go to the ends of this Earth and the next if he needed to. "You wouldn't get far either, I'd be hot on that cute tail of yours." He chuckled low and nipped at her a bit more before she motioned to her meal. He stood without hesitation, "Oh if you insist pretty lady, I don't know what I did to earn a night with the most beautiful girl in the Valley but you got yourself company!" He laughed happily and took up the kill, dragging it along as he followed her into their lonely den. 

Not so lonely anymore.

Once inside he'd wait for her to settle down in her chosen spot before moving the deer for easy access by her and settled in opposite her. H'ed be a gentleman and wait for her to dig in and get her cute muzzle bloody before he'd join her. They'd likely eat in silence, have a few playful snaps at one another over pieces each other wanted as a joke because the other went for them but aside from that, it was about filling their bellies. When they were finished however, Achilles would drag what was left of the food away to the side for later and move to her front where he could lap at her face and lick her muzzle clean. 

When she was nice and pristine again he'd stare at her face, a sudden question rushing to the front of his mind, "Sphinx?" His eyes would move over her features, waiting for her to give him the go ahead to ask. "What was it like...when HE didn't come back?" Of course HE being Her Gigantea, not the pup who'd replaced him. He spoke softly, he knew this would upset her but he'd never known the loss of one's God, not yet anyway. They'd never discussed this either, he'd known it had shaken her to the core but he'd never had her long enough to discuss the topic properly. Tonight was as good a time as any it would seem.

[Sphinx]

Sphinx listened carefully as he explained the whereabouts and happenings of their baby girls, and when he finished, she nodded solemnly. Of course they were out in the valley working, always keeping busy. The Warden Priestess couldn't help but chuckle sadly at the thought of them laboring away until they had something to show for it; it was just the way that their family was, she knew... but she really hoped that her beautiful girls--or was she to call them women now?--both knew that she was proud of them no matter what. Goddesses, she was turning into a sap, but who could blame her? All she really wanted was for them to come visit their dear ol' mom sometimes.

They'd never have to experience what she went through with Lilith and Stavros. They'd never need a revolving door of adoptive parents and benefactors; they would never need to beg for love. She would always be here, waiting for them, proud of them. Sphinx didn't plan on having her own children learn what it was like to live as an orphan, like she had.

She was grateful when her golden knight came to her rescue and pulled her out of her own thoughts with his playful banter. The pretty little priestess laughed happily at his words of coming after her."I don't know, my love, I'm pretty fast." She stood then with a wink and a smile, tail waving jovially behind her as he nipped her."But I quite like the idea of you chasing after and catching me. I might just have to let it happen." Despite her words, there was no need for Achilles to ever worry; she'd never leave him. She loved him more than words could ever explain, but it also went beyond love. At this point in their relationship, and at this point in her life, well, he was one of the last things she still believed in. The thought still found a way to shake her to her core. She had been one of the most devout in the valley--now what was she? No. She wouldn't think about those things. Not tonight. She would enjoy her day off with the love of her life. When he accepted her offer and moved to grab the food, she grinned and trotted off towards their den. "Oh, it probably has something to do with those handsome blue eyes of yours."

And everything else about him, if she was being honest.

She enjoyed dinner like she had promised herself she would. Food, playful snaps, loving looks... all shared under the moonlight sneaking its way through the entrance of their den. It was everything she wanted. But perfect moments never lasted long in her world.

"Sphinx?"  "Hm?" "What was it like...when HE didn't come back?" 

Sphinx wasn't expecting the question, and wasn't expecting the weight of feeling that she felt following it... for a second, everything fractured. It took her a few heartbeats of still silence to regain her composure, to beat back the wave of memories and emotions that threatened to swallow her whole every day. She couldn't blame him. He was her mate, and had gotten her through some of the hardest times of her life. He had done so much for her. It was a fair question to ask, and one he deserved to know the answer to. She only hoped she could get it across.

"It was like... it felt like..." The Warden Priestess rarely struggled with words. She was good at stringing them together... had done so for years in order to teach new members, pups, and slaves alike the gospel truth. They had kept her from starving, helped her gain her dream job, and had saved lives. Words had never let her down before, but they were failing her now. How could she describe what it was like losing her savior? "It was like I was in the tar. Every second of every day, the world was dark, painful, suffocating... but it was worse than that. It was like I was in the tar and still expected to do everything the exact same way I had before."

I woke up every morning begging for it to end, believing I was being punished for my sins.

"It's not like how they promise it will be.." Sphinx's voice lowered to a mournful whisper, voice cracking every now and then under the weight of her sorrow."The religion, the priests, everyone promises that you'll feel their spirit... that the core of the Rosas will always be passed on from one chosen wolf to the next. I should have felt him inside of her. She knew how close to blasphemy she was in that moment, but she couldn't stop now. It was Achilles, and he had asked. He deserved the truth. "Aglacea is not here, in body or spirit."

Ana was not Grendel.

"The next vessel was primed to accept his soul, but that vessel wasn't used. Maybe that's why. I don't know." Sphinx moved to rest her head on his paws, if he would allow. She was scared that her admittance of all of this would be the thing that put an irreparable crack in their relationship. She was no longer the devout that she had been when they had fell in love. Could he still really love her if he knew this? "I will still give my life for this White Rosa, and I still love her. But Aglacea was different, and nothing will be the same without him."

[Achilles]

He surely liked the idea of chasing her too, the hunt really got the blood flowing and maybe it could get some other things going too!

Her compliment earned her a wink from the blue eyes she loved so much, a soft and playful grin touching his features while a sparkle lit his hues. The stars weren't the only things shining that night. 

Their dinner finished, he let go the question that he needed to ask and it struck her, he could see it like he'd physically attacked her himself. It broke his heart to see her hurt but it was apparently something she'd needed sense the day Gigantea had vanished. Achilles felt the dread in her, could almost taste the raw pain seething from her with each word. He could do nothing but stare at her face, his ears tilted back, sorrow in his eyes. How could he allow her to shoulder this much anguish for so long, he'd been so selfish and stupid! He couldn't interrupt her, he wouldn't cut her off out of the fear that she might shut down and not finish opening up to him. Allowing her to finish was the only thing important to him right now. 

She set her head on his paws and he leaned down to gently lick at her neck behind her ear. 

He was here, he would always be here, he would never leave her.

"I'm sorry I didn't..." He spoke softly into her ear but he stopped. He was sorry, she had to know that but it didn't seem like enough, nothing did. She'd said it herself, nothing could ever be the same without her Savior. One might think that love should be enough, that her mate might have been able to fill the hole her God left but Achilles knew better. If Foetida vanished like Gigantea did, Achilles couldn't even begin to imagine. But he feared it worse than death. "I have a growing tenseness in my chest, a doubt in my heart." He rested his nose in her fur, shutting his eyes and let the heaviest sigh leave his nose. "They all left to the war, Foetida at the helm and I can't shake the feeling that maybe she might not..." He whimpered and pressed closer to her. "You've been without yours for so long," He shook with sorrow that had dug into his bones. 

"I pray for Foetida's return," and in the most silent of whispers, that was for her and her alone. "I pray HIS spirit finds a true vessel."

They had to be the most loving and devout of their Rosa, it stood to reason that they were also the most fearful and pained.