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+--- Thread: [PRP] shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] (/thread-5602.html)
shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Kazmiere - December 17, 2018
![[Image: fxRP7W1.png]](https://i.imgur.com/fxRP7W1.png)
Kazmiere’s endless journey to end his boredom seemed to be failing him lately. Things had grown very quiet once the snow fell. The white world around him had slipped into a deep slumber that he was not invited to join. He probably didn’t want the invite anyway, feeling far too restless to hibernate through the winter months like a bear might.
He had to admit, though, that it would be pretty cool to completely avoid winter.
Food was becoming scarce as the temperatures dropped. The trees were bare, no longer holding fruits or leaves, meaning the easier prey was harder to find. With very little food to eat, they were all hiding, conserving their energy and doing their best to not be hunted. That was great for them, but unfortunately that meant Kaz was left with a hungry belly. Honestly, he kind of loathed hunting – but it was a necessity. The lazy male had two options: starve to death, or get off his ass and do something about his growling stomach.
The tired boy rose to his paws, stretching his forelegs out long as he yawned deeply. He’d really done nothing the last couple of days, lazing about in an abandoned den he came across, keeping out of the cold and spending his time daydreaming. He’d had enough of that for now, however, and needed to get himself out of the den for a little bit. Time to do something with himself.
Stepping out into the crisp winter morning air, Kaz battled a shiver that wrapped tightly around his spine. God, he hated winter. All it meant was being hungry, cold, and lonely. None of those three things were overly enjoyable, and he had a few more months of this to endure yet.
Kaz started his trek for food, nose to the ground, trotting lightly through the fresh, fluffy snow. He hoped this wouldn’t take long. He was hungry, and also he didn’t have a lot for energy at the moment.
He scoured the forest for quite some time before coming across the scent of a rabbit, quietly mouthing the words ‘thank you’ in celebration as he followed the trail. His meal was nearby, he just had to find out where. Walking on silent feet, he slinked between the trees, sniffing the bottom of tree trunks and under bushes. Finally, he caught something out of the corner of his eye – a dark hare with vibrant undertones.
‘Shitty camouflage,’ he thought, smirking lightly. He crouched low, sneaking closer while staying as silent as possible, and finally pounced forward, paws extended and jaws parted.
Somebunny was about to have a shitty start to their day.
He had to admit, though, that it would be pretty cool to completely avoid winter.
Food was becoming scarce as the temperatures dropped. The trees were bare, no longer holding fruits or leaves, meaning the easier prey was harder to find. With very little food to eat, they were all hiding, conserving their energy and doing their best to not be hunted. That was great for them, but unfortunately that meant Kaz was left with a hungry belly. Honestly, he kind of loathed hunting – but it was a necessity. The lazy male had two options: starve to death, or get off his ass and do something about his growling stomach.
The tired boy rose to his paws, stretching his forelegs out long as he yawned deeply. He’d really done nothing the last couple of days, lazing about in an abandoned den he came across, keeping out of the cold and spending his time daydreaming. He’d had enough of that for now, however, and needed to get himself out of the den for a little bit. Time to do something with himself.
Stepping out into the crisp winter morning air, Kaz battled a shiver that wrapped tightly around his spine. God, he hated winter. All it meant was being hungry, cold, and lonely. None of those three things were overly enjoyable, and he had a few more months of this to endure yet.
Kaz started his trek for food, nose to the ground, trotting lightly through the fresh, fluffy snow. He hoped this wouldn’t take long. He was hungry, and also he didn’t have a lot for energy at the moment.
He scoured the forest for quite some time before coming across the scent of a rabbit, quietly mouthing the words ‘thank you’ in celebration as he followed the trail. His meal was nearby, he just had to find out where. Walking on silent feet, he slinked between the trees, sniffing the bottom of tree trunks and under bushes. Finally, he caught something out of the corner of his eye – a dark hare with vibrant undertones.
‘Shitty camouflage,’ he thought, smirking lightly. He crouched low, sneaking closer while staying as silent as possible, and finally pounced forward, paws extended and jaws parted.
Somebunny was about to have a shitty start to their day.
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Adigard - December 17, 2018
Adigard had headed out to where the oak trees were plentiful. Snow was on the ground, but it was soft enough for even a rabbit to effortlessly dig through. Should he need to, anyways. For now, Adigard followed his own trail. Alert and quiet as he could lest anyone else be following him, but once he caught up with his quarry, the little mouse only looked up and then went back to its previous thoughts. Its mouth full of something as it continued back on its way. Presumably back to its nest before it got too cold. Adigard only watched it, but did nothing but follow. For now.
And for now, the mouse and Adigard seemed to be silent friends. Them looking out together for hungry hawks and foxes. The mouse reached its nest, the tiniest of holes hidden under the roots of a tree. Easily missed. The mouse went in. Just as fast, Adigard thrusted his forepaws in after the rodent. He dug out a pawful of dirt as he went after the mouse, and whatever, or whomever, else called this little nook. The rabbit worked silently, as if this were routine.
He'd just dragged the mouse back out of its hole, tail trapped under one stubborn rabbit's foot, when the rabbit's ears perked and swiveled. He didn't even think about it, the rabbit's instincts kicked in for that moment and the rabbit bounded out of the way of his own hunter. Unscathed, but without his mouse...! The rabbit let out a frustrated groan.
Because of course! A big wolf of all things needed to hunt him now of all times!
The black rabbit scampered back, but only over to another tree, putting his tail to the bark while glowering at the big beast in front of him. "Hey flea picnic! Don't you have some bison you could be chasing around right about now??"
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Kazmiere - December 20, 2018
Kaz had experienced a wide variety of things in his short (but somewhat eventful) life. He even had a large cat brew him tea once before. Knowing this, you’d think he wouldn’t be surprised by too many things at this point in his life. However, that is very untrue.
When Kaz lunged toward his future meal, the dark rabbit scooted out of the way before he could land his greasy paws on its hide. But that wasn’t the shocking thing – the thing that really had Kaz scratching his head was the fact that this rabbit talked back to him. And not only that, he called the wolf a flea picnic.
The brown and black male stopped dead in his tracks, maw hanging agape. His feral instincts immediately fled from his mind, leaving him to stand there dumbfounded and confused. He should be going after the rabbit still, but he was having a hard time wrapping his head around what the fuck just happened.
“Did you—Just—Did you just??” He stammered, staring at the hateful little creature before him. “What the fuck?? Did?? You?? Why are you speaking??? At me???” He shook his head aggressively, hoping things would go back to normal if he shook his brain a little. But his bi-colored eyes still landed on a spitfire bunny with so much hate in his eyes, not fearful prey.
Then the irrational outrage set in, and rather than being completely stunned by the fact that his dinner was talking back to him, he was suddenly very offended by this lame-ass insult that was thrown at him. “FLEA PICNIC? What the hell dude? You’re a fucking … Bunny rabbit. I literally eat chums like you for breakfast.” Except for today, apparently. But that was not relevant right now.
“I ain’t hunting no bison. Do you know how lazy I am, Bugs?” The perfect nickname for this little twerp – not because of the famous cartoon character that was clearly very popular in the ice/bronze/dark age era, no, no. It was obviously because he was small like a bug. Yep. Easily squashable, if, y’know, Kaz wanted to squash him. He totally could.
When Kaz lunged toward his future meal, the dark rabbit scooted out of the way before he could land his greasy paws on its hide. But that wasn’t the shocking thing – the thing that really had Kaz scratching his head was the fact that this rabbit talked back to him. And not only that, he called the wolf a flea picnic.
The brown and black male stopped dead in his tracks, maw hanging agape. His feral instincts immediately fled from his mind, leaving him to stand there dumbfounded and confused. He should be going after the rabbit still, but he was having a hard time wrapping his head around what the fuck just happened.
“Did you—Just—Did you just??” He stammered, staring at the hateful little creature before him. “What the fuck?? Did?? You?? Why are you speaking??? At me???” He shook his head aggressively, hoping things would go back to normal if he shook his brain a little. But his bi-colored eyes still landed on a spitfire bunny with so much hate in his eyes, not fearful prey.
Then the irrational outrage set in, and rather than being completely stunned by the fact that his dinner was talking back to him, he was suddenly very offended by this lame-ass insult that was thrown at him. “FLEA PICNIC? What the hell dude? You’re a fucking … Bunny rabbit. I literally eat chums like you for breakfast.” Except for today, apparently. But that was not relevant right now.
“I ain’t hunting no bison. Do you know how lazy I am, Bugs?” The perfect nickname for this little twerp – not because of the famous cartoon character that was clearly very popular in the ice/bronze/dark age era, no, no. It was obviously because he was small like a bug. Yep. Easily squashable, if, y’know, Kaz wanted to squash him. He totally could.
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Adigard - December 21, 2018
The rabbit had a stern look to him, brows furrowing further and further the more the wolf talked. There was something about other creatures being surprised by a rabbit that talked back that always rang in his ears wrong. Thick-headed creatures, Adigard had decided. Yet as annoyed as the rabbit could get, the big wolf revealed a lot about himself in a single sentence. Adigard ending up smiling.
"Bug, huh?" The rabbit's dark eyes flicked away from the wolf for half a second, attention just momentarily back on the mouse hole. His prize. Then his eyes were back on the wolf. Adigard breathed in. "Then you should watch out or you'll get stung!"
Adigard flashed a small glimpse of his rabbit teeth. They were definitely rabbit teeth. Long and white. But it was only for a moment before he then went darting forward. For a moment, he then raised his head up as he came closer and closer. As if he was going to bite the wolf. Drawing within range, the rabbit suddenly went flat, head and ears low as he went sprinting between the wolf's legs.
Underneath the wolf, the rabbit then hopped up, attempting to knock his head straight into the soft of the wolf's belly. Adigard was betting on this stranger's lazy claims to entirely truthful.
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Kazmiere - January 02, 2019
This rabbit was not nearly as impressed with Kaz as Kaz was with him. A talking rabbit!? Fascinating, honestly. It’s just such a shame that this particular rabbit was an ass – never mind the fact that Kaz just tried to consume him; that’s beside the point.
To Kaz’s surprise, the rabbit smiled then. But it wasn’t an innocent, friendly smile. More of a … dark, sinister smile. He spoke then, making a bug pun before flashing his long, pointy rodent teeth and exploding forward toward the wolf.
Confused, Kaz barely had a second to think about what this rabbit was doing before the little bugger had darted right under Kaz’s forelegs. He lifted a paw and moved to crane his neck so he could see what was going on, but was suddenly winded as this little shit propelled himself upward right into Kaz’s gut.
Wheezing, Kaz stumbled away from the rabbit and furrowed his brow. “What the fuck man!?” He blurted, lifting a paw to his chest as though it would help him breathe easier. For a little guy, he sure could manage to do a decent amount of damage.
Those stupid jumpy legs …
His brow furrowed further as he stared down at the angry vermin, deciding today would not be the day that he got his ass kicked by a bunny.
Lunging forward suddenly, he went at him again. He wasn’t sure if he’d want to kill him now – something felt weird about killing something while it was begging (with real words) for its life. But he did, however, want to at least put him in his place.
And that place was in the dirt.
If Adigard didn’t move out of the way, Kaz would try to simply smoosh his face into the dirt with a large paw, holding him there and making him squirm for a while. Otherwise, he’d just try to stay on his toes and prepare for any potential headbutts coming his way.
To Kaz’s surprise, the rabbit smiled then. But it wasn’t an innocent, friendly smile. More of a … dark, sinister smile. He spoke then, making a bug pun before flashing his long, pointy rodent teeth and exploding forward toward the wolf.
Confused, Kaz barely had a second to think about what this rabbit was doing before the little bugger had darted right under Kaz’s forelegs. He lifted a paw and moved to crane his neck so he could see what was going on, but was suddenly winded as this little shit propelled himself upward right into Kaz’s gut.
Wheezing, Kaz stumbled away from the rabbit and furrowed his brow. “What the fuck man!?” He blurted, lifting a paw to his chest as though it would help him breathe easier. For a little guy, he sure could manage to do a decent amount of damage.
Those stupid jumpy legs …
His brow furrowed further as he stared down at the angry vermin, deciding today would not be the day that he got his ass kicked by a bunny.
Lunging forward suddenly, he went at him again. He wasn’t sure if he’d want to kill him now – something felt weird about killing something while it was begging (with real words) for its life. But he did, however, want to at least put him in his place.
And that place was in the dirt.
If Adigard didn’t move out of the way, Kaz would try to simply smoosh his face into the dirt with a large paw, holding him there and making him squirm for a while. Otherwise, he’d just try to stay on his toes and prepare for any potential headbutts coming his way.
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Adigard - January 04, 2019
The wolf had wheezed and sputtered like Adigard had hoped, and the rabbit took that opportunity to go straight for the mouse hole. Ferverently digging away the snow and dirt before his time ran out. He had just one ear pointed Kaz's way while he otherwise focused on what was in front of him. He didn't react to the cursing, but seemed to react to the sound of movement.
While reaching his head down the hole, Adigard shifted a little, moving just a bit closer to Kaz as the wolf closed in. To Adigard, wolves always used their mouths, and just a bit of movement might buy him time to dodge the jaws before escaping with what he wanted.
Not so.
While he managed to avoid getting his face pawed down, Adigard pulled out of the mouse home just to take hefty weight to his shoulder and neck. Flat on the ground. Pinned.
The rabbit's eyes were wide, furious, impatient, and definitely panicked about what comes next with these sort of things. Yet his quips were muffled by a struggling mouse the rabbit refused to let free himself. Adigard thrashed and squirmed, trying to turn belly-up under the paw while also shouting something probably-awful into the fur of the mouse. While he moved, Adigard's free hind legs swung out furiously, kicking up snow as he wiggled.
RE: shut up, i'm trying to eat you [machati] - Kazmiere - January 10, 2019
Silly little bunny rabbit thought he could escape the wrathful attack of Kaz the mighty wolf – but he was wrong. Very wrong.
Kaz took pride in the feeling of smashing the rabbit’s upper body down into the dirt with a hefty paw. Success! Ha! It didn’t even cross the wolf’s mind that this should be something very easily done by a creature of his size – hunting rabbits was something he did all the time. But whatever. That didn’t matter right now. This was different, clearly.
Adigard had successfully captured the mouse, however, and hung onto that thing with all his might while he squirmed and muttered profanities into the mouse’s fur. His legs kicked and lashed out while his little body twisted and writhed beneath the force of Kaz.
“HA! Idiot. Look how stupid you look. You thought you could outsmart a wolf.” He barked a loud laugh as he threw his head back and puffed his chest out. “What a dumb little bunny. You’d never outsmart—Wh—Whoops—HEY!” And just like that, Kaz felt the angry rabbit wiggle free of his grip while Kaz was very much not paying attention to what the fuck he was doing.
His head fell down, bi-colored eyes staring wildly at his feisty prey. “Don’t get any ideas now, mister. I’m still teaching you a very … Valuable…. Lesson. Yeah.” A lesson. Yep. He was teaching this stupid rabbit a lesson. That’s what was going on here. Not trying to hunt for lunch – nope.
Kaz took pride in the feeling of smashing the rabbit’s upper body down into the dirt with a hefty paw. Success! Ha! It didn’t even cross the wolf’s mind that this should be something very easily done by a creature of his size – hunting rabbits was something he did all the time. But whatever. That didn’t matter right now. This was different, clearly.
Adigard had successfully captured the mouse, however, and hung onto that thing with all his might while he squirmed and muttered profanities into the mouse’s fur. His legs kicked and lashed out while his little body twisted and writhed beneath the force of Kaz.
“HA! Idiot. Look how stupid you look. You thought you could outsmart a wolf.” He barked a loud laugh as he threw his head back and puffed his chest out. “What a dumb little bunny. You’d never outsmart—Wh—Whoops—HEY!” And just like that, Kaz felt the angry rabbit wiggle free of his grip while Kaz was very much not paying attention to what the fuck he was doing.
His head fell down, bi-colored eyes staring wildly at his feisty prey. “Don’t get any ideas now, mister. I’m still teaching you a very … Valuable…. Lesson. Yeah.” A lesson. Yep. He was teaching this stupid rabbit a lesson. That’s what was going on here. Not trying to hunt for lunch – nope.