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+--- Thread: [ACCEPTANCE] Whispering Grass (/thread-4626.html)
Whispering Grass - Amando - July 04, 2018
Bracers are long since lost, and the leather that's wrapped his body since Borogrove has finally quit creaking as Amando approaches the border. He knows better than to trespass; he used to be the one that handled those sorts of things. Flowering trees rustle in a light breeze, midmorning sun already shining off the plate on his back and sticking fur with sweat underneath. He stops, a few feet back, plants himself in a sit with an uncomfortable clank and watches the way they beckon. He's been running from Borogrove for months now, BlazePack for years, his father his entire life. Green eyes close, and he breathes in the scent of flowers and sentries.
Amando's always had a fear of commitment (ask every man he's fallen in love with and then violently avoided) and that hasn't changed just because all his wandering has hit ocean. He doesn't howl, out of pure nervous procrastination, but the border markers are fresh. Besides, it's not like he has anywhere better to be.
When a sentry-- anyone, God, how long has he been alone now?-- appears, the timbre wolf jumps to his feet, tail flicking anxiously as they approach. "Hey! Um..." You had how much time to think about this? "I uh, I'm Amando. Don't mind the armour, I kind of... can't reach the buckles." That's what the boyfriends were for. "This is probably a silly question, but, I was wondering... Well, can I come look at the trees?"
He's hesitant, scared as the swamps, terrified to tell anyone that he's only here because the grass has been waving him this way for weeks, and the flowered trees are practically begging for a friend. He's just so, so lonely.
RE: Whispering Grass - Aeolus - July 06, 2018
There was a scent from the borders that was impossible to miss given the uniqueness of it and the fact that the breeze had blown it right to him. It was time for work although he had started his work day at sun-up so this was just an almost change of pace, though not really as borders were part of his job already just usually there wasn't much to do but patrol and observe and make note of those observation. The only time that changed was when someone was actually at the border or had decided to cross over it. He moved quickly but quietly so as to be able to observe who was at the border and assess what they were like when they thought no one was watching. After a moment of taking in the curious appearance of the stranger sitting a respectable few feet away from the border he slipped from behind his concealed vantage point making his presence known and watching the rapid reactions of surprise on the part of the arrival. As he moved closer he notices the indications of anxiety in the other which could be cause by many things. Hopefully none that might have an adverse effect on Inaria but that was yet to be determined so he nodded his head in acknowledgement of the other and to indicate that he was listening as the other was already talking.
The other gives the name Amando and mentions armour?..hm..it was a term he'd heard before but in reference to reptilian things which did not seem to be present here which in the absence of reptiles and the presence of those odd things covering the other he supposed those coverings could be assumed by way of simple logic and deduction to be the armor that was being referenced. What the point of the armor was well..in reptiles it was for protection so if one followed that logic the armor the stranger was wearing served a similar purpose which was a bit concerning. The unusual request to look at the trees was likewise somewhat concerning. Such an interesting, albeit concerning, combination he had here. It was also a unique challenge but someone had to do it and he was perfectly willing to take it up..it was an interesting one after all..plus there was the matter of it being his duty to address such things.
"Greetings Amando, I am Aeolus a Sentinel of these lands. Your armor is quite unique, if you would be so kind to indulge my curiosity what is your armor protection for?". That should get things started of figuring out if there was a potential threat from this one here, even if it was an indirect threat. "As for the trees, guests are allowed to visit though not usually for the sole purpose of admiring the trees". He stated hinting as gently as he could that Amando would need a better reason that wishing to admire the packs flora if he wished to gain entrance into Inaria.
RE: Whispering Grass - Amando - July 07, 2018
He's a picture of professionalism, sitting in an interview and barely restraining himself from fidgeting. The word Sentinel has his face falling, frowning, but not in disappointment or disregard. A little something like fear. Borogrove had Sentinels, although their purpose was very, very different than this. Aeolus seems nice enough, anyway. (Then again, so does Amando.) When asked about the armour's origin, the timbre looks himself over, like someone just complimented the shirt he'd forgotten he was wearing. "Oh, it's not that special; there are about four others just like it." Templar, Edward, Marigold, Titus-- okay, stop thinking about it; you're making yourself sad. "Well, I guess it doesn't do much, anymore. Ever." He shakes his head, gets his thoughts together. "It was just the uniform for my rank in my old pack. I kept the peace." At least, he tried. As Aeolus inspects him, Amando looks off at the trees, how light plays off the petals. "They're not around anymore." Either of them.
The mention of visitors regains his attention, ears perking up. "I'm not a tourist, or anything. I just want to..." The wolf looks around a bit, ears flattening. Honestly, he doesn't know what he wants. He smiles, scrunches one side of his face with it, lowers his head nervously and asks, "Do you believe in fate?"
Amando doesn't know what he wants, but does anyone?
RE: Whispering Grass - Aeolus - July 07, 2018
He notices the change, though slight, in the others demeanor as he states his rank and wonders what the reason for such a reaction might be..past unpleasant experiences with borders perhaps? Which if that was the case the question became why had such experiences occurred. He did not allow himself to be distracted by such things though and instead continued to listen to the explanation of there being four others who also apparently had such armor with the additional statement that it doesn't do much or..ever had? That last is a little more difficult for him to be sure of as it is clear to him that Amando is struggling. There is much going on here he thinks which is confirmed with the next statement of the new arrival of it being the uniform for a rank held in the others former pack. It was a story with an oh so familiar ring to it. As more is revealed he finds he can easily sympathize with Amando's tale for it had been the same for him. He too had held a rank in another pack that had fallen while he was away..while he was supposed to have been delivering a message here seeking aid. He hadn't made it back then and had returned home without delivering the message only to find that his home had fallen in his absence. After that well..it had taken some time but he had come here finally completing his task and had wound up assisting Inaria in a war and becoming a Page and Sentinel while he and the pack were recovering at the end of the War of the Flowers.
And now he was here listening to another tell a tale similar to his own. He couldn't let that affect him though. He had a job to do, a duty to his new home just as he had had a duty to his old one. At the question of believing in Fate though..no. He couldn't get distracted, he couldn't let sympathy for this other cause him to shirk his duties and obligations. His role as a Sentinel and even as a Page required he ask questions, gather information so as to make informed decisions and he would do so. "I don't know". He stated in answer to the query about his belief in fate and then followed up with his intended questions. "Do you seek Sanctuary then? Or do you seek something more permanent?". That was a good place to start or to continue from rather as it had already been started with the introductions and the first exchange making the questions a continuation really but it was also a start of sorts. Of course the technicality of it probably didn't matter to the other or possibly to anyone else aside from himself, but as far as he could tell from others reactions, that was a fairly common occurrence.
RE: Whispering Grass - Amando - July 08, 2018
He shakes his head with a smirk as the Sentinel indulges his little philosophical interlude. Truth be told, even Amando isn't certain what he believes. IvyPack Stargazers told him all sorts of things, but he forgot all their fortunes well before they had come to pass-- if they ever did. The timbre considers the word sanctuary before deciding against it. IvyPack was supposed to be a sanctuary, and that's what got them killed. He thinks of Borogrove, and the strictness of their Scouts, how Titus would collapse on the porch of their house in the marshes after a full day of patrols as ordered by the fanatical Captain Cat.
Amando is wrapped in leather, and he still feels suddenly cold. "Permanent," he decides with a conviction he's willing to fight for, even if he doesn't deserve it. He's fought for less. The feeling that sinks heavy in his chest like rocks in the wetlands when he remembers long hours with too much fear to sleep, curled around Ouro and beneath Titus, and deciding he could sleep when he was dead-- he would do anything to have that back. He would go back to Borogrove, and their enforced, intolerant religion, and the risk of losing his life for speaking up for someone who couldn't, if it meant he could have that back, for just one more restless night beside someone he loved. "I'm looking for somewhere to settle down. I want to protect whatever friends I make, and teach people about plants, and--" The treetops tremor, urging him to stop, this talk could have had him killed in Borogrove--
This isn't Borogrove, and if it's anything like them, he doesn't want to be here, anyway. He breathes deep, listens to the leaves, and asks Aeolus, "Am I in the right place?"
RE: Whispering Grass - Aeolus - July 08, 2018
The other shook his head and smirked and he vaguely wondered if he should be insulted at the possibility of the question being intended as a joke of some sort but it seemed like it had been a serious enough question so likely not intended a s joke which simply made the reaction a curious one. The next reaction from Amando is quite different though as a desire for permanency is proclaimed with a surety that there is no mistaking as such. That was good, it gave a definite direction for this meeting to proceed in and Inaria could always use more individuals who were willing to stay in it for the long haul. He listens as the other continues providing more information about what is desired that also provides insight into what skills Amando could offer. There is an uncertainty in the other though, a sort of anxiety he notices that is odd and he knows it will have to be addressed. It becomes even more apparent when he is asked if this is the right place to be by the other. He wonders how to go about it though. He doesn't wish to reveal too much of Inaria and its inner workings to someone who has not officially been brought into the pack, at least not as yet, but he also needs the other to be open enough to provide information.
"Those are admirable qualities and ones that would be greatly appreciated here..". He begins having decided on a way to approach the matter. "Were such things not appreciated by your former pack? Or the others with armor?". That was something that needed to be found out. If there was anyone out there like that who might come calling it was important to know. It would also provide insight into Amando's background to provide a better idea of what could be expected from him if he were to pass inspection and be granted entrance into the pack. "As for this being the right place for you, there is more to choosing a home than just what skills one has to offer. I have the authority to determine whether to accept you into the pack or turn you away, just as with any who come seeking a place to live but I can not speak with any authority on whether it will feel like home to you any more than I could for any of the others who have asked or perhaps simply wondered the same". And that was all he could do. He could determine whether someone might be useful to the pack and not pose a threat but he couldn't tell any of them how they would feel upon joining, that was something only they could decide on.
What Amando would make of such an answer, what the decision would be, he didn't know. He had provided the other with information and all there was to do was wait to see how he would need to proceed.
RE: Whispering Grass - Amando - July 11, 2018
"Were such things not appreciated by your former pack? Or the others with armor?"
Amando honestly scoffs. "All they cared about there was loyalty. Not even the good kind-- you know, that you earn? Nah. You do as you're told, you sit through their sermons, and you don't leave." He licks his muzzle. Leather shifts. "The rest of the Police were nice, though. I was friends with one," more than friends, "but the rest were just coworkers, I guess."
It's a strange admission; he's never had coworkers before. He referred to the whole of IvyPack as "his girls" in youth, has a terrible yet appropriate nickname for everyone he's met, but the Police were just... people he worked with. He had a House in Borogrove, but it was never close to a home.
"As for this being the right place for you, there is more to choosing a home than just what skills one has to offer." Doc Dog never said anything like that when taking him in. In fact, no one from Scouts to Sentinels seemed to care whether anyone wanted to be there so much as whether they should-- and it's not like they had the option to leave, either way.
"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," Amando allays. IvyPack started off as just a place to crash, until he started listening to the land and actually talking to who he was surrounded by. Even in Borogrove, he found good people. He's the kind of guy that could find good anywhere.
He would swear he sees a smile in the purple petals as he says, "With flora like this, I'm sure I'll be just fine."
RE: Whispering Grass - Aeolus - July 12, 2018
The other scoffed causing him to mentally raise a brow wondering what might cause such a response. When the other provided background on the previous place of residence it made a bit more sense. The pack Amando had come from sounded as if it might have been a bit strict but strict didn't necessarily mean hostile. That was something he would need to delve a bit deeper into it seemed, this former pack of Amando's. "This is a peaceful pack but even here, as such, loyalty is important, as is doing what one is told and even here one can not just simply leave". He stated wondering if there was more to the story of this other pack or if maybe Amando simply wasn't meant for pack life. That meant he had something else which he would need to address before this conversation concluded especially as the others attempt at assurance that there would be no problem was not exactly reassuring.
The remark about the flora was also not exactly helping. Not that the pack didn't need healers but in a pack the other members were supposed to be more than co-workers. Not that everyone had to bond perfectly well with everyone else or had to be super close to everyone else but still having at least some connection to those you lived beside was rather expected and he wasn't sure that Amando quite understood that. "An interest in plants is all well and good but what about your fellow packmates? A pack is more than plants after all and so I'm afraid I must ask if you are sure pack life is for you" He said studying the other closely.
"You scoffing at your previous pack's expectance of loyalty and doing as told and making a lifetime commitment and your regard for your previous packmates as no more than co-workers makes it seem like..you might be more inclined, and have greater enjoyment, pursuing an independent, solitary role in life interacting with others only when you wish to and in whatever manner you wish to do so. That is not how it works in a pack. In a pack others might decide they wish to interact with you, form a bond with you, and you will be expected to do just that. This pack is about the collective joining and uniting together, forming bonds strong enough they can not be broken by those wishing to do so and despite this being a peaceful pack others have indeed tried to do so". He was now going to get to some hard facts but they would also provide a good measure for what sort of individual Amando was and whether he was the type to run at the first sign of trouble or stay until the very end.
"These lands have not too long ago experienced war against another pack. I can not think of any family within the borders who did not lose at least one member to the war and to death. Parents lost their mates and for some their children, and children lost their parents and siblings. Without unity, loyalty, commitment and following orders this pack would likely not have survived. It only endures by those who live here being willing to give everything they have in preserving it and protecting it". He fixed Amando with a steady gaze and then asked.."Are you sure you would be willing to do the same? Would you be willing to give up everything you want for yourself, to do without, and then to die for the pack without ever regaining any of what you sacrificed?". That was the question. Did Amando expect to gain something in return for joining or was the other willing to die for the pack without ever getting anything for doing so? That was where character, true character, was determined. That was what he was hoping to determine by asking.
RE: Whispering Grass - Amando - July 26, 2018
His tail comes up as Aeolus speaks, whole body set stiff. He hasn't hurt anyone since before they went to war, but in the back of his mind, he can feel that old familiar drive. It's not rage, or fear, or anything like lust. He killed to keep the Healers safe, because there were children there, and in Borogrove, their own children--
"You don't know me," Amando blurts, like a geyser boiling up from the warm earth. Maybe he cuts him off, or maybe he's been silent for some time; the timbre's too trapped in his head, because Aeolus is on about sacrifice and the responsibility of pack like, like Amando doesn't know. He jaw is tight, but he still speaks somehow. "I know war, alright? I know death, and don't you dare talk to me about sacrifice." He gave the family he'd forged, the chance at ever sleeping soundly, his own sister for IvyPack. A heaved breath stutters beneath his chestpiece. "You wanna know what was wrong with Borogrove? It wasn't the creepy quiet, or ghosts in the swamp, or dressing up in the corpses of their enemies that did nothing but be in their way. No, I wore this stupid uniform to keep me safe from my own packmates. The job description was keeping the peace, but what they really wanted was to keep them compliant."
He's shaking, but doesn't want to sit. He's ready to run. That's the coward's way, right? "I led a pack once. I was young, had no clue what I was doing, but it worked out alright. They were like my sisters, I'm telling you..." He wouldn't have killed for coworkers. Gleaming green eyes, formerly fixed on the ground while he recounted, focus on the wolf across from him. They're narrow, but shine a little more than they did before. "They killed kids, Aeolus. Borogrove. They killed children."
It feels like his heart's stopped, but he can still hear it. Amando wasn't there to see it, but he hasn't slept right since he was a kid, and there had been a birth in IvyPack, that he oversaw, because he oversaw everything. He'll never forget that newborn pup, fresh and new, eyes not even open, mom heaving triumphantly as the Healers cooed over her, and Amando licked the kid clean. It wasn't even his-- but just then, all his teen angst and the ambition to get away from home and make something of himself turned itself over and decided he would spend his life protecting people like that. The Black Sun of Borogrove saw his own son being born, and snapped his neck.
Amando finally lets his tail droop, although he still shakes. Maybe Aeolus is right; maybe he belongs alone. He joined Borogrove because they were hurting from the locusts, and he did just a great job watching out for kids around there. "I've been to war once already, Aeolus," Amando admits, voice giving slightly. He closes his eyes, and clenches his jaw. Still struggling with the memories of it all, quietly, he practically pleads, "Please don't make me go back..."
RE: Whispering Grass - Aeolus - July 28, 2018
When the other's tail goes up and Amando going rigid he shifts, but slightly, he doesn't want to make it more likely that the other will attack but he has no intention of being caught unprepared for one either just in case. He listen's to the accusations, the information, the emotions which sound so conflicted, as they pour forth from this stranger on the doorstep. He reflects on the similarities between himself and the actions he has observed in his fellow packmates since the war. The similarities between this..Borogrove and Saboro are also well noted. Such things can not be ignored..neither can the outburst. It has been something he has been taught, trained for, over and over again. In his first pack, his former home and then again here in his new one..sometimes one had to make the hard decisions, the hard calls. He had faced difficult decisions before, not that that was really saying much of anything as there was really no such thing as an easy decision but still, this one somehow seemed harder. Perhaps it was because he could understand, at least in part, where Amando was coming from. It was that very understanding though that also made him realize that Amando was, or at least seemed to be, where he had been long ago. Angry at the world and angry at himself not wanting to be alone but also not wanting to have anything to do with anyone else.
If that was where Amando was well..he couldn't just accept the other in such a state. But he was a Page as well as a Sentinel so he tried to do what was best for everyone and while allowing Amando in as a full member right now would not be best for Inaria, sending him back out would not be best for Amando so..he would choose the in-between. He would have to try and word his decision as carefully as he could though. "You have been through alot Amando and going through so much takes time to recover from. Inaria can provide you Sanctuary, at least for a little while, so that you will have time to recover without being burdened by the responsibilities of a full member. After you've had some time we can revisit your becoming a member or if you wish to leave at that point that will also be allowed. For now I will show you where guests of Inaria reside". And as long as the other was willing he would do just that if the other chose to leave though with being turned down for a full membership at present that would be fine to, unfortunate of course but he wouldn't stop Amando from leaving.
((sorry this is so short but luck me has somehow managed to get sick and running a fever in July so..yeah. Just to clarify Aeolus is bringing Amando in as a guest seeking Sanctuary rather than a full citizen due to the outburst raising concerns about Amando's emotional health and ability to cope with being in a pack again after everything he went through))